Come along then old ducky

My goddamned back again. What is going on? why oh why, Delilah?

You know, apart from the crippling pain that shoots through me every time i so much as look towards an object not directly in front of me, the thing I can't bear about back pain is the frustrating inconvenience of it all. I've had to take another day off work, because of the sheer annoyance of not being able to go from a very painful sitting position, to a less than comfortable standing position. And as for my dance class? pah! Jive Bunny gave up on me years ago.

What I do need to do though is walk around. So off I went today to the supermarket to buy a few essentials (L'Oreal, Durex, Lavazza) as well as some diced beef for the heavenly CSIRO provencale cassoulet. I shopped very light, knowing that I couldnt carry much, and that I am on a diet, and NOT buying rubbish, which, you'll be pleased to know, I did not.

However, I did buy a cantaloup, which, as my bag ended up weighing a tonne anyway, was probably not the most sensible of purchases.

......................

"Are you going to that register? Excuse me are you heading to that register?" I shouted at the near dead white haired old bat as she shuffled aimlessly around the register area, looking directly at me but not registering a word. She kind of reminded me of Madonna.

The entire supermarket was full of wrinklies. The average age must have been about 65 and that's INCLUDING the troup of guides selling brownies out the front. They were all kareening around the aisles mindlessly, as if blind, or drunk, or both.

"No, Eddie," I said to myseelf, "they're just old. One day, you will be like that, so be patient and tolerant."

ONE DAY??? how the frack about today then?

..............................................

So I'm sittin' at home, talking to JANET about me VEINS....no really, I feel like Lynn Postlethwaite from D-Gen..."you KNOW how busy I am today, you KNOW I have a letter to post.."

Which is what, In fact, I did do today.

So I hobbled down to the post office and posted off my form to the Australian Electoral Commission to remove me from the roll. I know this is a minor administrative task, probably not worth even thinking about under normal circumstances, but for some reason, I was strangely moved by the gesture. You see, as I lurched around flailing for a balustrade, lightpole, zimmerframe to hold onto, my age and mortality suddenly struck me like a bullet train. Having struggled at the supermarket and the post office during the frenzied pensioner packed daytime rush, I got to thinking that really I should go and see a doctor and put my name down for an MRI to find out what is actually wrong with my back. Then, by the time my name comes up on the NHS waiting list, I'll probaably be old and infirm enough to require surgery, and get whisked right in. When Im 65.

Diet day 3

coffee coffee coffee coffee
2 pieces white toast, honey and marmalade
2 slices of bread- snacking
2 chicken drumsticks, cooked in garlic and soy...mmm
ham sandwich
pear
Beef cassoulet - low fat low gi
mashed potato - a bit naughty
sneaky glass of red wine or 6
LOTS of water
no soft drinks